Laura: Curtis, I got my hair done, my nails. Yesterday Richie and 3J were playing 'Nick and Carl'. Don't mess with Mrs.Bonecrusher! Waldo: Man, they didn't even know who we were. [music abruptly stops] Look at yourselves. Estelle 'Mother' Winslow: Yes, those were very confusing times. Judy Winslow: Who wants to read about cheese? Well let me tell you something sir, if that's the kind of boss you are. Rachel Crawford: When the paramedics got there, they thought SIXTY-SEVEN people had died! Laura: Yeah, every time I used the bug spray. Hey, what were you doing in my closet? Laura Lee Winslow: No! Stefan Urkelle: Not I know that's not Carl. Eddie: [while Eddie and Carl where doing wiring for the satelite dish] Be Careful with those wires Dad. Carl Otis Winslow: No. Urkelbot: [Joe Friday Impression] Just the facts, ma'am. Laura: Waldo, what's with Steve, he's acting wierd, even for him! That one friend who says going to gym will solve everything. Carl Otis Winslow: I didn't bring my gun. And what about the car show last Saturday? Estelle 'Mother' Winslow: Steve, how did you get so good at checkers? Steve Urkel: [Steve picks up the cord to the satelite dish] Sloppy, Sloppy, Sloppy! Steve Urkel: Why, come back here, you little hussy! You have the right to remain silent. I realize the reason you don't love me is because I'm weak. Just blacked out for a second there! Laura: Sure. Carl Otis Winslow: Yep, Benjamin Banneker. Our limo awaits. I'll just begin a rigorist-training schedule. Steve Urkel: I know! Carl: Stefan, you gotta help me. Some Sorry looking roses that are 3 hours away from potpourri. Carl: This baby has a remote. 4 Mar. How much will that cost me? Carl Otis Winslow: Well there's no rush. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: This diary belongs to Harriette and I will not violate her privacy. In fact, they finally introduced me to my grandparents. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: [Steve as Stefan] Steve? [cries]. [Steve thinks Rachel is in love with him, but she is really in love with another man named Steve]. Eddie: I meant, I haven't seen her today. Stefan Urkelle: I'll have to buy new parts for the chamber. Money has germs on it. Dec 25, 2011 - Explore Nadia Hussein's board "Steve Urkel", followed by 259 people on Pinterest. Did He Do That? - The New York Times Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: [to Carl] Worse. Steve Urkel Pick Up Lines - tqquu.rocks Carl Otis Winslow: Ohohoho and they are personal and private. Cornelius Eugene Urkel aka OGD: Serious. Harriette Winslow: [Waldo crashes his snowmobile in the Winslows' living room] Waldo? And him. Harriette Winslow: [Opens the candy box] Candy missing. Laura Lee Winslow: [crying] Steve why do you always say things like that? Like a moth to a flame. You gotta fix that machineeeee. Steve Urkel: Hey, I was following Eddie's instructions. Pretty girl, dark hair your sister for God's sake! Waldo Geraldo Faldo: Well I for one am appalled. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: What's your aunt's name, who'd want to kill her, and who do you like in the World Series? [Pulls Steve to other side of room] Steven, last semester I specifically asked you what class you would not be taking this semster and you told me HOME EC! Steven Quincy Urkel: I will *not* sleep in the bathtub! Laura Lee Winslow: No, it really bugs me that Steve is the only guy with enough guts to stand up to Willie. Estelle 'Mother' Winslow: Carl and his father planned on doing a lot of things together, but they never got the chance. Laura Lee Winslow: Well that really bugs me. Read the card, read the card. Steve Urkel: Oh no! Steve Urkel: [panicked] um perhaps you mean "biosphere"? Estelle 'Mother' Winslow: That's one month longer than they taught it to me. Edward 'Eddie' James Arthur Winslow: Why? Carl: What? Estelle 'Mother' Winslow: Carl, you lazy slug! Laura: Science class. 12. r/Unexpected. Steve Urkel. There's no justification for this behavior! [the half nerd side of Carl goes into the anatomy of worms. [Runs with Steve to confront Waldo and Weasel], [Eddie tries to flirt with a cute girl, unaware that Carl is behind him]. [Eddie leaves and Carl puts the chair away] Well that took care of everything. I'm in this class. Let's just get there! Waldo Faldo from Illinois. The truth is you deserve a kiss. Carl Otis Winslow: Yes, Harriette! Donna Santangelo: And get this, Urkel's tuxedo fits! I'm here. Edward 'Eddie' James Arthur Winslow: Seymour Butts? This isn't right Weasel. Urkelbot: [sneaks up behind the robber and surprises him] Freeze! Rachel Crawford: I'll just take your word for it. I only got the date wrong on one flyer. Steve Urkel : Free Download, Borrow, and Streaming : Internet Archive Steve Urkel: No, it's not okay! Harriette Winslow: She's still pretty upset, she wouldn't even touch her dinner. Harriette Winslow: So what you're saying is it's full. At a party, once, he clamped cables to his earlobes and jump-started a Volkswagen. You refuse to go out with me for the last decade! Harriette Winslow: Well, Eddie said something came up, but he promised he'd empty the trash tomorrow. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: Stevil was back and he was coming for my soul! Steve Urkel: I hurt myself. You're late for class. [heads for the stairs - Carl grabs him by his suspenders] I almost got ya there, Carl. Carl Otis Winslow: Richie, I get the money back if the helmet breaks. The next minute rump roast! [to Steve] I'm wearing you DOWN, baby! No Traffic. First of all, this is not a real date. Especially this one, since Urkel breaks the fourth wall at the end. Steve Urkel: Calm down? You've been saying it for weeks. This means you guys have to go together. Urkel actor Jaleel White is launching his own cannabis brand | CNN Business Well, name a couple. I'm jealous of Todd and you want me to help him. steve urkel pick up lines - pentagram.restaurant Stefan Urkelle: Good lord, you're a nerd. Laura Lee Winslow: Aunt Rachel, take little Richie, the Murphy twins are giving each other haircuts in the backyard! Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: Eddo, Eddo, Eddo! Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: Well of course it's a Greek party, it's a sorority! Estelle 'Mother' Winslow: Laura, do you mind if your old grandmother tells you a story? Myrtle Urkel: Frankly my dear, I just don't give a damn. Estelle 'Mother' Winslow: Harriette, there is a child outside digging up your azaleas. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: Chuck is twice the man Raoul is. Laura Lee Winslow: [as Laura Wigglesworth, pointing a gun at Johnny] The narration to finish! Cornelius Eugene Urkel aka OGD: That's big talk coming from a guy in Italy. SUBSCRIBE to get the latest. Eddie: I'm sorry, Steve. Edward 'Eddie' James Arthur Winslow: I prefer to call it sharing. Laura Lee Winslow: Oh you're not a sorority, you're a bunch of vicious, stuck up barracudas with teased hair and push up bras. Forget it, Steve. Laura: By being born first. I just wanted to make things better but I ended up making them worse! Steve Urkel: It wasn't that play that cost you the championship. I got a nosebleed at birth. Rachel Crawford: Harriette, we've got to talk. [picks up a single serving container of gross looking food in the cafeteria]. [steps on the gas]. Curtis: I don't know how to tell you this, but I have to tell you straight out. I'm going home! Steve Urkel: Well, Laura doesn't want a date with me. Rodney Beckett: Steve, come on outside. Waldo Geraldo Faldo: I'm missing the parade. [laughs]. Carl: 3, 2, 1 1, 2, 3 What the heck is bothering me? Estelle 'Mother' Winslow: [sympathetically] Eddie, Carl was just about your age when he lost his dad. [Faces Eddie] Look at him, charming, handsome, popular. Steve Urkel Pick Up Lines - zrrie.us Cop: [Searching Willie and Waldo] Ok, where did you hide the booze? Gun, Carl. So go ahead, FIRE ME! Everywhere you look, TV, movies, magazines, all these 90 pound people, smiling, dancing where do they get the strength? Estelle 'Mother' Winslow: Way to go Carl! Laura: Well, then not even in your dreams. So long! We're starved. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: Cornelius Eugene Urkel, you have better find a good excuse to leave town soon. It meant a lot to me. I can teach you how to cook. Eddie: Man, I don't have time to study. At a party, once, he clamped cables to his earlobes and jump-started a Volkswagen. Trying to cover it up only make things worse. [sees the kids] Oh my Lord! Right now you have over a 100 crazed teenagers in your backyard ready to boogie. [Willie grabs Waldo and takes him with the cops who arrested them], [Steve has humiliated Willie at the party that he grabs a small glass of Vodka and pours it into Urkel's cup]. We all stand nice and quiet until Gramps and Granny make it legal. Becky Sue: Oh, we couldn't do that. You made me so nervous that I had to go to the hospital to get the thimble taken off. Stupid? Why that low-down-cheap-bunder-headed-mud-slinging-bush-wacking-slanderous-snake-in-a-skirt is blackmailing you! All the doo da day. If you cut me, do I not cough? Harriette Winslow: And deliberately sat us next to a cigar smoker. Harriette Winslow: [while trying to calm an apprehensive Rachel about leaving Richie overnight with the babysitter for the first time] Rachel, I know it's hard leaving your baby for the first time, but after that it gets a lot easier. Eddie: I guess this means you're gonna ground us, huh? Harriette Winslow: [Takes an envelope from Carl] 'Lose Weight, Feel Great at Chicago's Premiere Health Spa, Hip Whippers'. Ms. Steuben: Well, I guess he's changed a little. I think I'm gonna have to fire Waldo, Steve. Why, you teach us things about life! And I'm sorry. With Squeeze I'm not safe nowhere. No, you're not invited. Carl: There is a guy on our couch who says I remember him, but I don't remember him. Everyone would think that Laura is in love with Steve Urkel and no one would vote for her. Steve Urkel: L-long enough to get i-icicles on my nose hair Look! Laura: Look, I owe you an apology. Harriette Winslow: [gives him a tray of drinks] Here, take these with you. Steve Urkel: [sobbing] In about a week or so, but she gonna have to miss the prom. I won't be able to take you to the prom. Aunt Oona: The water main snapped when the roof collapsed. Oh, you're a sore for sight eyes! Muskrat Time! Who? I've decided to retire from the theatre arts department. Laura: Let's eat everything and see if he can take a joke! Carl Otis Winslow: Well is she still crying? Maxine Johnson: It happens every year the day of the prom. You're grounded for two weeks and you are to stay away from my car until it learns self-defense. "Family Matters Quotes." Then there's in the summer, when we use him as a human bug zapper. The Urkel mock will think bigger in potential screw-ups for teams that have valued assets poorly in the past than for teams that have made few mistakes. Laura Lee Winslow: If you have to ask, pass. When are you going to the store? Carl Otis Winslow: Well guess what Harriet, it's not empty. Played by Jaleel White, Urkel joined "Family Matters" at the end of its first season, which one of his castmates says was a production decision that changed everything. Carl Otis Winslow: Harriette, I just feel so helpless! Please, my little Rapunzel. Carl: I can't tell him I don't remember him! Waldo: But, why ya gonna do that, Willie? Carl Otis Winslow: He's trouble. If there was one thing I thought the show could have brushed up on, it would be the premise of the episodes. You're wrong, the maitre'd gave me a two for one coupon. If I remember correctly, the safest place to be during a nuclear explosion is in a reinforced basement. Steve Urkel: [thinking he's playing hide and seek with Laura, Eddie, & Judy and a shower starts running] That shower running doesn't fool me Laura! Rachel Crawford: Maybe you could come back when your voice has changed. Chain: It occurs to me that you could be wired. Family Matters: Steve Urkel's 10 Greatest Inventions, Ranked - CBR Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: [He walks towards Eddie and pulls out a folded flyer he took out of his pant pocket. Estelle 'Mother' Winslow: Every day for 6 months. Steven Quincy "Steve" Urkel: [is chased and hides behind a jock] Hold me back, hold me back. I'm being born! Laura Lee Winslow: Now, for the championship and the toaster oven, who made the first patented shoe sewing machine? It's either a number or a letter! But, it's only a compliment and it doesn't mean anything more than that. The man was open all day! Cornelius Eugene Urkel aka OGD: He must've been dangerous. Carl Otis Winslow: Out for a walk around the block. Carl Otis Winslow: Why not try the truth! Rachel Crawford: Oh. Would you like that? Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: Well why don't you take the guy's next door? [splashes Waldo with the spiked punch]. 36 Steve Urkel ideas | steve urkel, humor, urkel - Pinterest Carl Otis Winslow: [Gasps] Why of all the low down Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: Calm down, Carl. Chico! Waldo: Don't do it, Urkel! "What has 132 teeth and holds back the Incredible Hulk? Steve Urkel: I bought two tickets to a concert that Laura wants to go to and offered to take her as my, get this, date! Can you believe that? Sure, it may cover your hiney, but if you make a habit of it, you've got a serious problem. I'm cooking breakfast. Harriette Winslow: [grabbing Carl's hair] Carl [Takes her hand away, looking at it before placing it on top of his head instead]. During the class picture, you don't have to sit with the girls in the front row and hold up the class sign. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: Big Guy, what are you up? Due to the Urkel character's off-putting characteristics and the way he would stir up events and underscore the plot or even move . Laura Lee Winslow: [Laura grabs Steve and his clone on their ears] Okay, let's take a moment and figure out what we learned here. I could hear him sobbing in his suspension chamber. Laura: You know, I shouldn't be mingling with the opposition, but I just wanted to tell you how handsome you look under fluorescent lighting. Harriette: Don't even think like that. Carl: I sure hope so because I'm wearing his underwear. Steven Quincy Urkel: Come on, yeast! Steve Urkel: From my stay-away fund. Willie Fuffner: [Grabs Steves gloves] Urkel, you are dead meat! Steve Urkel: Laura! Carl Otis Winslow: I told him I was taking him over to see you. Ms. Steuben: But here you are. And I just got the wax sucked out of my ears! You don't want to get fried. Steve Urkel on CBS? You're setting a bad example for the kids. Look, I love you with all my heart, but just because you don't love me back doesn't give you the right to treat me like dirt! Carl Otis Winslow: You look horrible. "Will you marry me for just one night?" 7. Pick-up lines get a bad rap for being cheesy and cringe-worthy, but if you start your conversation with the right dose of interest and humor, you may end up scoring a date or a number. Harriette Winslow: [to Rachel] Believe me! You're my friend. Trying to cover it up would only make it worse. Estelle 'Mother' Winslow: L means lousy. Judy Winslow: Boring. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: March 10, Went to the market. Harriette Winslow: Oh, well it's nice to meet you, Curtis. Jaleel White, the actor best known for playing Steve Urkel on the 1990s sitcom Family Matters, has launched his own cannabis brand - on the day enthusiasts around the globe enjoy a toke. While he was starring in "Family Matters" as Steve Urkel, White also began a side hustle as another staple of the era's popular culture . Rachel Crawford: It's okay, Steve. How did you know? Laura Lee Winslow: You're lucky, you got into a great fraternity and all it cost you was your best friend. Carl Otis Winslow: Oh nothing, never mind! No. Quotes.net. Steven Quincy Urkel: I'm not through! Steve Urkel: Ready, my sweet? [Eddie comes crashing through the living room in the car], [Stefan did not take his "cool boost" for that week - he wants to turn back into Steve]. Why, how low can you get? So, is it all right with you? My zipper." 5. Harriette Winslow: No, Carl let's call it what it really is, Cheap and Lazy. Estelle 'Mother' Winslow: Aww that's cute. Steve Urkel: And lose that wonderful ocean flavor? Laura: Sure, Steve. I have a muscle in my forehead that will not stop jerking! [Harriette laughs as Laura leaves the living room to help Mother Winslow get ready]. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: No no no no no. 'Steve Urkel' actor launches cannabis brand on 4/20 Cornelius Eugene Urkel aka OGD: You all right, Mr.W, [he teaches Carl how to handshake in his neighborhood. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: [Tries to hold Eddie from pounding their friends] Eddo. THIS? Oh my God! Steve Urkel: So, you used me!